Exhausted :(


This post is kinda of my ‘curcol’
I dunno, I just started this week, with exhausted feeling… How did it happen?
Well, maybe because they are bragging at me. They asked me to write proposals, but they (until now!) haven’t give me what i want… “What I want” here is not about the money! Its more than money, something which is very valuable in my life, much moreee… than money! Money is not my priority you know. The **** is the most important thing now! I know that Im kinda impatient… I realize that (actually) I need process to get that, but please… don’t make it the process too long! Because you know me? I just can’t stand of the long process and full of bragging and unnecessarily things… Gw paling ga betah ama kebohongan apalagi hal-hal ga penting!!! So, if they want to give me that, please give me that because I’m capable, not because I’m the new kids on the block! Biasalah, tipikal orang Indonesia, melihat sesuatu secara senioritas, bukan karena kemampuan seseorang, ah damn!
Okay, okay, take it easy Lengga… Keep on praying and do your best (I whispered to myself hehe)

But Alhamdulillah, how exhausted I am, there’s always good things happen in my life…
Couple hours ago, I just received an e-mail from Een (a lecturer from STSI Padang Panjang who is now taking his Master in Malaysia), about my revision… Yep… I’m his additional supervisor! So proud of that 😉
And I just revised his thesis… Of course in systematically way and for better English… And he is really respect me for that, he just agreed with revision that I made. Itu yang paling penting bwat gw, saat pendapat gw dihargai oleh orang lain… And you know what? He paid me for that… I mean, paid… in a BIG amount! Uhm,, actually I don’t feel comfy, because he paid me, because you know, he was my student when we were in ELS, and more than that, he is also a friend of Bang Em (my senior in INRM, who is now taking his Ph.D in Kansas America), so yah gw ga enak aja nerima duit sebanyak itu dari dia… Shht… FYI, he will pay me with an equal amount to Acer Tab Iconia… Sumpah gw ga enak bgt… Jumlah itu kan banyak banget… More than my one month salary in INGOs…
But he said, he just prepared all the things and he respected my effort to help him. He even offered to give me the money now. I said, NO! I just accept my rights, after I finish my duty to him 😉 Quite fair, isn’t it?
And exactly guys, my life is kinda sooo…busy now in Bukittinggi. I keep on training the Xaverius teenagers, then revising Een’s thesis, and also campus stuff like borang for accreditation and many more. But, about borang… I just feel like that I’m doing it alone. I write it by myself, and formulate it by myself. No one is helping me… Tapi ga papalah, ganti2 belajar, toh ga ada ruginya… Orang2 yang ga mau mencoba bantu gw itu yang rugi, they with their laziness don’t want to develop themselves. Kalo menurut gw sih gitu. So I don’t give a shit to them… Biarin aja, yang penting gw belajar. Keep positive thinking, Lengga…

Anyhow, just want to inform you, BP will follow prosecutor test on Friday… I’m wishing him all the best, no matter what happen… I’m gonna called him before Friday 😉 Hehe, you know, I’m not a romantic girl, who keep on calling a man everyday, every-week and bla bla blah… Iya, dibalik semua kelebayan dan kenarsisan gw, gw mana berani nelpon BP duluan, kecuali kalo gw bener2 KTT (Kangen Tingkat Tinggi) hahaha… See? You can judge someone with labelled narsis or lebay, if you don’t know his//her real personality. Gini2 gw cengeng tauuu… Jauh dari lebay dan narsis deh pokoknya hihihi. So, to be honest, in L.O.V.E I’m typical of traditional woman… Catet!
Well, its 2.44 am, I should sleep (again), but I have to pray isya and tahajud first… I’ll see you in the next post. Bubye 😉


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